Column: Drink Driving

I was woken up by my Mum ’phoning today. Not uncommon the day before her birthday, usually to make some hint about forgetting a card. Today I was ready with “I missed the post” or, “I’m just about to post it, you’ll get it on Monday” … until she stops me mid–sentence.

“I’m sorry, it’s always me that has to break this news. Joe is dead. In a car accident this morning. Steven and Ed are in hospital, I don’t know how they are.”

FUCK.

Joe was my first crush. I was 5, and he was 16. He was a Rangers supporter whereas his big brother was a Celtic fan. He was tall (ok, I was 5), dark, blue eyes. As I grew up, he was always there. When I started going out drinking and clubbing (when I was well underage), he was there. If a bouncer so much as hesitated and about to ID me, he’d jump in and get me in straight away. If I was too drunk to make it home after a night out, I’d just crash at his. On his sofa, nothing dodgy. Mum always knew where I was and knew I was safe because she treated Joe like a son. When I had my first serious boyfriend, he’d let us have a place to stay.

I moved to Uni, a pretty scary place for a 17–year–old, and him and his girlfriend (my then boyfriend’s sister, oh how tangled) came and visited the day after I had my tongue pierced. I was mangled. But they were one of the only folk to have ever vistied me from home.

On Boxing Day just then, Joe (who has recently become a father) and his wife Sarah were down at Mandy’s. Mandy insisted I went, even though I was determined not to go out. I wanted to stay in. I hate the festive season. I sat and spoke to Sarah. She told me how intimidated she’d always felt by how close I was to Joe. His fucking wife saying she was intimidated by a little girl who had a crush on her husband 16 years previously. Crazy.

Anyway, Joe fed me speed for the first time (probably nothing special to share, and normally I wouldn’t have taken it, but I trusted Joe), we went out, and I had the best night I ever did back home. Shortly followed by the worse come down ever. Think trying to sleep after seven cans of Red Bull and a caffeine sensitivity.

So that was Joe. My hero, my big brother, my bad influence. And he’s gone.

Ed will be ok. I’m sure of that. He’ll get out of hospital and do it again. I can almost guarantee it. Steven is only young, 17/18 (I forget). I’m hoping this will scare him enough to know that drinking and driving is not ok.

I told Mum, that it’s a shame we are so desensitised by drink driving at home. So many of my friends, my brothers’ friends and my Mum’s friends have died this way. Yet I know my Mum will still get into a car with a drunk driver and still get pissed off when I make a big scene about it. It’s becasue we live in a rural setting and there is little police presence. They think they can get away from it. Away from the police yes. From death? It seems not.

[Semprini]

I totally agree, I can't stand drink-driving.

No excuse for it whatsoever. Just selfishness.

[Kenny Everett]

I know folk in glasgow who still have a few and drive, they need to read stuff like that to drill it home.

[Elfaba]

thats terrible!

really sorry to hear that lizzie

dont mean to be all holier than now but i totally agree

there's very very little excuse for it

i was involved in a car accident a few years back as a result of a drunk driver and it wasn't nice at all. I have never taken a drink (not even the one) and driven - and i ended up with my car wrecked because of someone irresponsible and totally selfish

its not only just a case of "be it on ur own head" it affects other people too in various ways - ie you and all his other friends and family in this case, and other folk who get involved in collisions that are no fault of their own cos someone else has had one too many

I lost one of my neighbours in Florida to that - he too was from Scotland but stayed there all year long and owned a pub and one night tried to drive himself home after a lock in and drove home on the British side of the road and had himself killed.

Only ever once have i ever had any sort of sympathy or empathy for someone who was caught under the influence - and i never even knew the guy. I was in court giving a witness statement for my case against the drunk driver who had done my car in. I saw another case that day where a guy had been stopped by the police for drink driving with his wife in the car, and when asked the circumstances of the incident he said that "he would do it again unquestionably without hesitation under those circumstances" - in that his wife was pregnant and thought she was suffering her third miscarriage in two years. Fair enough they could have called an ambulance but he didnt want to waste any time at all and when you've been drinking quite often your sense of logic and/or reasoning is sometimes impaired slightly. I did feel really sorry for him in this case and obviously there were ways around it but he is the only drink driver I've ever come across that I've had any kind of empathy for.

anyway sorry again for your loss

[Helter Skelter]

Sorry to hear that Lizzie, but your right about the attitude towards drink driving in rural areas. Where I come from is in the middle of nowhere and every time I go out back home I see the locals come into the pub, get in a state and then drive themselves home.

I'll even hold my hands up and say that I did it a couple of times too. When I first learnt to drive and was a lot younger it was amazing how easy it was to think that you were still in control even when you'd had a few. Everyone knows what's it's like to convince yourself that the couple of drinks you've had haven't gone to your head. Especially when everyone around you is doing the same. Unfortunately I did this a couple of times when I was in charge of a car. I never got blazing drunk when I was driving but a couple of times I drove after 3 or 4 drinks which was wrong. Luckily nothing bad ever happened and after doing this a few times I came to my senses.

However, that was a lifetime ago (8 years to be exact) and although it doesn't make it right, there are many on here who can vouch for me when I say that I don't touch a drop if I'm driving now. It still surprises me how many people offer me a drink when they know I'm driving though. They always say, "go on, one won't hurt", but I know that being the light weight I am these days sometimes even one can go to my head. I also notice that the people who tend to say this are the ones that don't drive. Maybe it's because they don't appreciate how much is at stake if you do have a drink and then drive.

I'm not proud of what I did and I'd appreciate it if people refrained from giving me a bollocking on line for making such an admission. I've already beat myself up about it and don't need someone else to tell me it was wrong when I've admitted that. I just didn't feel it would be right to go on about how wrong drink driving was and being all self riteous when I know I did it once myself. The last thing I would want to be was a hypocrite.

[Zooropa]

That's a nice personal article with a good slant on it.

I hate even driving the day after a session. You can feel the reactions are slower.
Had a near call once going past Lenzie Primary one Friday morning, and vowed never to even consider driving to work after a night out the night before.

So if you're ever walking down the old railway line between Kirky and Lenzie on a Friday morning and see me wobble towards you on my bike, watch out!

[Elspeth]

Just found the paper report. Made it all a bit real
http://www.pressandjournal.co.uk/dis...=sidebarsearch

[Elfaba]

sorry pet *hugs*

[Rev Scapegoat]

Originally Posted by Semprini

I totally agree, I can't stand drink-driving.

No excuse for it whatsoever. Just selfishness.

Aye. Utterly.
I feel sorry for the folk who survived, and are now having to deal with tragedy in their lives as a result.

[RandomFactor]

You're spot on about the rural mentality. I lost count of the number of cars my cousin wrote off over the years, not just through drink driving, but just an overall attitude of carelessness.

You've got all my thoughts and best wishes sweetheart, losing someone that close to you isn't something i'd wish on anyone.