[SPG] Mick's Aussie Adventures

[GreatKingRat]

lol, I know, it's 36 seconds long (and 640w by 340h) and the goal happens in the first 10 seconds.

[Tommy]

if youve got Premier you can snip it

[GreatKingRat]

I know, but I lost all my software when I had to format my hard drive.

[¡Punk!]

I knew about the Morton game (SkySports Live Updates and MortonUnofficial.net thank you very much)

Wilson - make sure Phil gets me a seat on the supporters bus to Livvy if he or Dave or Mr. Scally are going.

Toothache: cunting British Embassy don't pay for emergency medical costs here. How shit is that? On VERY strong painkillers and it still hurts a lot but it's just about bearable. Dentist tomorro - I reckon getting it yanked out will be cheaper than any other treatment so I'll get that done then buy some anti-biotics and see how that works out.

Cricket: done better today. I really, really, really can't play forward defensive shots or, for that matter, any defensive shots. It's a slog or nothing for me. Couple of 4's and 6's and a lot of nasty nicks down to slip and such. I tried my hand at bowling: not a spin bowler by any means.

[Sgt Pepper]

Hey Mick jst answering ur question we actualy did have a white christmas here this year but wasnt tht great!

[Rikki]

aye, the first since 82 apparently but im sure we had one when i was about 5??

[Tommy]

Rikki




Merry Christmas

[Young Blood]

any luck?

[¡Punk!]

I remember a white christmas here the year after I was in Australia the last time. But the snow was just left over from the night before so wasn't officially a white christmas or something.

Allright well kids: to recap.

I'd been quite bored of everything here. Hadn't really seen the city at all SO I decided to do something about it myself and not just wait on my family actually taking me anywhere. I was gonna go see the 5th day of the test but Shoab got bored and Australia won it in 4 but I decided to go into the city after the dentist's anyway.

So I had went online to find Melton's train station. It's one big long walk away from the house (about half and hour) but it's a straight walk down one big street so it's easy to find. So after the dentist's I went to Melbourne. It's only $5 for a ticket (two pounds) or $10 for a return but the last train home is 9 at night and I wanted a realy day/night in the city.

Anywho I ended up in Melbourne about midday. The river here, the Yarra, is far from clean but the riverbanks are well kept and nice and touristy even if all the cafe's are very over-priced. The south bank of the river was wonderful just walking up and down it (I'm no photographer and keep forgetting to take pics that I should but I'll try and get a pic of it before I go) and I done that for about an hour 'til I got hungry.

I was really in the mood for a steak pie so went into an Irish pub for a Steak and Guiness pie and got talking to the bar staff. Four girls, all from Ireland, who were a great laugh. The pub was empty bar me and a drunk guy in the corner so I had a couple of ciders and we were all just taking the piss out of the fact we've came all this way just to sit in Irish pubs. That sorta set the tone of the day tho: I was meeting people, as friendly as fuck, all day.

So I was actually feeling a bit light headed by now. 2 Pints of cider and some guiness in the pie had obviously mixed with the anti-biotics and pain-killers I got from the dentist. So wandered the city centre.

There were a lot of shops and touristy places which I wandered around in but wasn't interested in buying anything. There are a lot of porn shops here tho and one said "$2 Peep Show" so I thought FUCK YEAH! When in Rome. I went into the shop and the girl behind the desk asks how can I help you? I asked her about the $2 Peep show but it's just a coin operated porno video thing that lasts 5 minutes and she told me it was very discreet. So I figure what she meant was $2 and you've got 5 minutes to toss one off and clean it up. Wasn't keen on that so I said no thanks. Then she told me for $10 I could have 5 minutes with this girl then pointed to some Fillipino/Vietnamese/whatever girl who was looking at a menu.. I didn't want to take the poor girl away from deciding what to eat so just went upstairs instead to the shop where the guy was listening to SLF. So I was talking to that guy for a good 20 minutes (much to the annoyance of the people who were there to actually buy things) and he recomended a few pubs and such to me then I left and decided to go a wandering again.

So I wandered up to the AFL Hall of Fame to learn about Aussie Rules and shit and, lo and behold, Geelong Football Club wear blue and white hoops. So I bought a Geelong top. (pro-nounced Jilong)

Then I decided to hit the Rialto Tower observation deck and see the city. The photo's will say more than I can but it was a good wee day out.

So on to the pubs. Melbourne is NOT a touristy city unless you've got a couple of days to go to the zoo and such and it is FAR from a party city (even if the clubs dont shut til 6 usually).

So I decided pub crawl: I had $140 dollars (maybe more - I can't remember) and decided to pub it. I'd been to about 5 pubs by the time I reached the Exford (the porn man recommended it) and I had been chatting to people in all the pubs. Just being a bar fly and saying hello to people I met. I met Indians, Kiwis, Irish people, Aussies (obviously), English, Samoans, yadda, yadda. All friendly buggers. But the place was The Exford.

The Exford hotel is right at the corner of Chinatown and my genius (although unattended) was to put all my spare change (about $2 in 5, 10 and 20 cent coins) into the tip jar. Which made a BIG noise and all the bar staff looked at me and said thanks. So when I was sitting at the bar they all made the effort to talk to me. Asking me about Scotland, what I was doing, etc. and making me feel very at home. Nowhere in Australia does snakebits but the girl behind the bar was topping up my pints of cider with lager for me for free and the guys were giving me doubles for the price of singles. I've never left a pub drunker.

In the Exford I met some really cool people. A gay fella called Ryan who was also engaged to a girl and was about to spend the rest of his life unhappy but his family were deeply religious so he was trying to remain in the closet. A half Thai/Australian guy who was hustling people at pool, a junkie girl called Skye who was amazed that I was from Scotland and kept asking about Skye itself and an old boy called Ralph who's wife had died 3 years previous so he sold his house and bought a caravan and uses the money had made to go to his local brothel everynight. Yes. It was one of them pubs: full of freaks. Reminded me of The Steamie so much.

So the rest of the pub crawl was good. Met a LOT of interesting people then about 12 I had two choices: club it or go back to the Exford which was open 24 hours. I decided to go to the "alternative" club in Melbourne called Goo. It's just an alternative night at a club called Metro. Cheapish drinks there and the barman was Scottish although he'd lost his accent.

The music can only be described as what the top floor was like at the Cathouse unders but I met a few aussie punks who all wanted to know if I knew The Exploited. I told them I did. Haha. Was funny at the time.

I stayed there, had a few dances, had a few drinks, got talking a lot and eventually decided to leave. I was left with a small problem of finding somewhere to sleep.

I'd managed to spend ALL my money on booze apart from $10 (which I would need for some anti-drooth gatorade in the morning and my train home) so wandered about looking about for a bench. I walked past a porno-shop which called itself a "liberated bookshop" I liked that. But there were rats the size of really big rats all around it. Eventualy I went back to the South Bank and slept round the back of the cafe's there leaning against a big anchor. I slept for about 3 hours then walked back to the station for the train home.

All in all the best night out I've ever had probably.

[Young Blood]

i was talking to my aussie skinhead mate tonight - he has some silly stories

they're great but about silly people he was mates with....

[Rikki]

sounds like a good day/night out, wish i had met some yadda's and isn't snakebite illegal everywere ? see you soon.

oh and merry christmass to you tom

[¡Punk!]

I think snakebite might be illegal but she was doing it on the sly and clearly wanted to do me on the sly as well but I said "OI - AUSSIE - NOOOOO!" god knows what type of diseases these crazy Australians have.

[Young Blood]

no rabies apparantly...

[Vuk!]

Originally Posted by Punk y Twat

Sadly Vuk I don't have an Aussie accent. Did you have a white Christmas in your neck of the woods or do you need to wait for your Christmas still?

"our" christmass is on 7th jan, but i don't care much about that one.
my grandma is from germany, so i have two christmasses (argh!). so yeah.

this thread is too big for me. where are you exactly now?

is aussie beer any good?

[GreatKingRat]

Mick'll be home in a few days!

Boy, do I miss him.